Bernie Sanders and Cardi B Make the Perfect Team, Actually

Welp, ladies and gentlemen, we have finally arrived at the peak of political thought. Democratic socialist and presidential hopeful Bernie Sanders has effectively been endorsed by non other than hip-hop “musician” Cardi B.

Cardi B, for the uninitiated, is a pop star known for a myriad of hits including the song “Bodak Yellow.” Here are some of the lyrics:

“I’m the hottest in the street (pew, street), know you prolly heard of me (yeah)
Got a bag and fixed my teeth (teeth), hope you hoes know it ain’t cheap (cheap)”

Powerful stuff.

Cardi isn’t just known for her musical career, however. Earlier this year, the singer admitted to drugging and then robbing men she met during her time working as an adult entertainer. And let’s face it — if she was a man, she would have been set on fire, loaded onto the next SpaceX rocket, and launched into space.

Knowing this, it makes sense that she would identify with Bernie Sanders — a man who is a bit less subtle about his desire to rob everyone else in America to pay for his crappy healthcare plan. They really are two peas in a pod…


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